Today I have none and the more I try to find some the harder it becomes. My inbox is full and my to do list is long. If something isn’t an urgent priority it just doesn’t matter to me today. Mail will go unanswered and bills will go unpaid. I’m in the office but my body is tired and my brain is too so I’m actually only in the office in body but no where near in mind or spirit. The only thing I will get done today is a bit of reading, Facebooking and maybe chatting with a friend. And you know what? Thats OK!
We can’t always be on. I mean, sure.. we can try but eventually some part of the system starts to shut down. I’ve been through a burn out so I know what it’s like. This isn’t it. This is just having such a big pile over your head that you buckle and just say “Fuck it.” My world isn’t falling in around me I just need to stop and listen. That’s what I take this feeling to mean and when you have days like this you should do exactly the same thing.
I’m actually in a very good mood, just useless.
The world will not cease to exist if you let a few things slip through the cracks and wait until tomorrow, or even next week or next month for that matter. Sometimes we have no other choice but to listen to what our body and mind are truly trying to tell us. If we fight it, as we always do, it just gets worse. We get sick, or something else happens, and then finally we have no other choice but to surrender. And who wants to be sick in spring anyways? So I choose surrender!
I will stay at the office though and I will continue to do things but only things I genuinely want to do. I will not push back and I will not fight it. What’s the point? What I do produce in the end wouldn’t be that great anyways with this energy behind it. I’m lucky to even be writing this but its something I want to do. I just wanted to take a moment and say that sometimes it’s healthy to play hooky and just drop everything. So the next time this happens to you embrace it and keep a smile on your face. Every day is golden, just some in different ways than others.
I think I’m going to go buy junk food and chocolate now with no guilt and even a bigger smile on my face. Have a good day, whatever you do… or don’t do!